Pilotlog Page 11

U6's Pilotlog entry:

U6 Spit 1Aa
Kendo Spit IA

u6 0 kendo 1

Yep I really screw the pooch on this one. Kendo's got the spit 1a down pat and he can fly her with precision. After our first pass I decide to go vertical. Kendo goes low into a nose tail turn. We remerge with me going down and hes going up at me. I pull up into him again as we trade oblique nose to nose turns. I guess I got greedy 'cause as im going over the top again i banked my wing too soon to ty to get a fix. I find myself in some kind of weird stall
apparently unique to the Spit 1a.

It stalls in a funny way when u get greedy in a funny way. As I'm sitting in my cockpit wondering why I'm not spinning, not getting any airspeed,

Finally I get some airspeed but my plane is STILL not doing a dang thing until im like at 2k above the water. By this time Kendo is waiting patiently behind and about 2k above me. (I think he was a little suprised to see me just falling like a leaf for so long.) Well his bullets put quite a few holes in my wings but my fuselage was still intact and I finally (geesus) recover the birdie.

At this time Kendo has altitude and speed on me and hes hungry. I start my jinking thing and hope he can overshoot. Unfortunately I stall again trying to get defensive and when I recover this time I can see kendo has a perfect tracking shot on me. My engines go at that point with smoke and I am forced to smash the bullet
hole canopy out to see. Its just a matter of time and NOT FLYING!!! Im wondering to myself "shit! wheres kendoooo!!! and why is my airspeed stuck at 30mps RED!!!"

Well I'm blind sitting in my cockpit in a steep dive feeling and seeing kendos bullets all around me and my wings. Though Kendo was sporting enough to make 2 more passes at me so as to amuse himself with my predicament.
I finally lose her when the engine seizes.
Kendo 1 u6 1

U6 Spit 1a, kendo spit 1a
Sorry i cant remember all of it but basically I was able to wrestle the iniative from kendo and finally
had him low and slow and struggling to give me a guns problem. He manages to keep a line of flight for several seconds as he is committed to getting out of my sights. I can track long enough to let em go and he goes smoke.

u6 1 kendo 1

I figure I want to learn this bird quick and the best way to learn combat is to bet your simulated life on it.
So i pick the 1a again cause I wanna beat kendo in it while I'm FLYING hehe. Well it doesn't work out that way. It turns out that the spit 1a is better flown by kendo than by me. Kendo holds on to his bird longer than I and he manages to get a few shots at me too whan I lose the offensive. This is one match where I almost had the offensive position but I screw it up and as I'm jinking to get away I lose her again as I see kendo above me, apparently still flying. Rats!

u6 1 kendo 2

Now Im scared so I try to put a variable in there, the spit 14. As we merge I go vertical to feel out kendo for awhile. He's flying her well. I quickly change from energy to an angles fight and start pulling her hard. We are swishing back and forth in an oblique downhill scissors. When we get to the deck I start barrel rolling to get some idea if theres gonna be any opening. Its getting scary and this beast is a bitch.

For some reason Kendo extends away to build up speed and shows his tail for awhile. He attempts to re-enter by turning high and right. Instead of going for the head on I try to keep a lag pursuit profile so as to maintain some of the angles he has involuntarily surrendered. Eventually he stalls the beast low but manages to recover just before surfing. I am high on his 6 at this time and although it looked easy from there I must admit kendo made it extremely difficult and scary. But I finally tracked and got his engine. Made another sporting pass at him but he was under 90 knots and obviously struggling to keep her aloft.
I felt relieved.
u6 2 kendo 2

Kendo goes for the spit1a (I shudder internally). Ok Jack, don't let yourself get into this....

Kendo keeps the pressure on as we are losing alt fast. Were stuck in this looping thing for awhile and I stall twice!
Kendo makes a pass or 2 at me and gets a bite. Fortunately my yawing or whatever allows me to see all the pretty tracers wihout actually feeling too many. I finally recover and see kendo up high waiting for me to hit the sea. Were at about 5 k so I'm able to pull up into him and start a vertical scissors.

I'm not sure what good it did cause the next thing I remember is we are at the waves locked in a death turn to the right. Gawd I hate those! The situation disintegtates to the point where there is no way out for kendo nor myself. We are essentially neutral at this point with me having a slight advantage. We are both flying the wires. I start the "pull her at him" thingie and make a few degrees at a time. Finally I'm behind him but low and very slow. He's got about 200' more of altitude and he's pulling hard as he can. Im at about 30 feet keeping him in sight and the waves at my right wing are also of great interest to me as well :)

I manage to sneak off 10 more knots of speed and use the last notch of flaps to go for broke. At the moment I commit my nose up he is flying a predictable path cause he cant do anything else. Im barely able to bring the nose up and he keeps just out of the pipper for like 3 or 4 revolutions. As the pipper finally gets in front of his plane I let em go while I'm hearing the stall sound. He starts yawing right and I do too, to keep the pipper at least somewhere near his bird. Geesus!

I think my instant right rudder kept me from stalling cause I tried not to get greedy but hehe..
Anyway some of my bullets made it to kendos engine and he lost power after that.

u6 3 kendo 2

Shit hot Kendo! Stop scaring me dude! These matches are so knuckle busting tense I'm sure I'll get my due soon enuf. Hey do me a favor buddy. Go challenge yer wingie, Beaks, will ya? :)))))

Sabre's pilotlog entry:

Well it was time for our rematch..just in case ya'll forgot Vapors had shut me out in our last encounter 3-0. While I hold no grudge..the match did point out a huge weakness in my flying skills. Spins and slow flight, flying on that ragged edge without stalling/spinning. Enter Goshawk..my instructor..(maybe I should start calling him
Obee-wun, yes I feel the force master!!)..we work on my flying the Spitfire..the spin wagon of choice it seems. We work and work till my ham fisted attempts to control that throughobred give way to the gentle tugs and flat letting go of the stick that she responds to best. Well Gos your work was not in vain..thank you again sir for help and guiding hand.

Ok the first fight Vapors chooses the Spit IX. We mount our trusty steeds and away we go. Vapors dives for a quick fix of energy,while I climb storing it as I go. I watch him has he pulls up and is firinig before I make my move. I force an over shoot and the game is a foot. We turn and twist in all manner of angles with both of us taking pot shots at each other,some damage is done but nothing major. Then he spins or rolls out of his turn I'm not sure which..either way I have the advantage in position and energy..I close him he's turning real hard
trying to force and over shoot. I choose my angle and fire letting him fly thru the stream of bullets. He takes damage and is smoking badly. But hes still flying and able to maintain altitude. So I carefully dive and take shots at him slowly filling his plane with holes. The way he's flying he's not letting me take any good shots at him..always high deflection shots with our desparity in speed only gives me a few rounds per pass. I will not concede my energy advantage..so all I can do is fire, pull up and come down and take some more shots at him. Finally I catch him with a good burst and he is engulfed with flames. Literally becoming Vapors!!

Sabre -1, Vapors -0

Round 2 Vapors chooses the Spit 1A the one that started it all. Well at the merge Vapors is firing away at me..we trade shots but with no real damage. Those .30 cal don't do much damage.Well we trade head on passes with both
of us trading shots. Finally I work my way around and able to take some shots at him. We are turning hard when I see him stall and spin into the channel.

Sabre -2, Vapors -0

Round 3 he picks Spit 1A again..we do the head on passes again.. until I see the whites of his eyes..what he's wearing!!! Oh no, its the Japanese headban of the kamikaze....true to form we collide with his wing coming off...hehe..he forgot that with him serving as host.. no damage would befall my plane.

Sabre -2, Vapors -0, Draw -1 (kamikazeeeee!!)

Round 4 Spit 1A seems tobe the mount of choice. At the merge Vapors makes a huge mistake he breaks and pulls right in front of me. I'm laughing with delight..a shut out, 3 strikes and your out!! But I'm fast and thats not good. I trying to stay with him I'm blacking out and I lose my advantage..in fact he's now got the advantage(auuugh!!!!!!!). Any way I'm way ticked that I could be so stupid and pay for it dearly by having my plane riddled with little bitty holes from bow to stern. Now its my turn to go swimming...dam that water is cold and black.

Sabre -2, Vapors -1, Draw -1

Round 5 I pick my favorite...the Tempest..we merge and the fight is on..we start to turn and while we are waitnig to turn I'm drinking a coke and puffing on a cigar(not really,but after those spits it really is slow).Finally, I get a little angle on him and get a few deflection shots as he passes by. I continue the turn hoping to improve on the angle.I do, getting good hits on him,just by holding down the trigger and letting him fly thru that HELL(literally) of cannon shells. The (4)20 mm cannon make short work of Vapors...his plane goes in.

Sabre -3, Vapors -1, Draw -1

So the rematch ends with a win for me,but like round 4 you can never count Vapors out..you make a mistake and he will BEAT YOU!!! Salute!!!!Vapors sorry to end your perfect record in defending your spot. I know you will move up though and good luck in your next match!!

Greasemonkey's pilotlog entry:

What a day, upon returning from my match with Chappie the poor hung over soul I march straight over to the challenge board outside of Goshawks office. Seeing a good pilot record next to Burning Valley I issue my challenge. Looking over to my hot water logged plane, I can just imagine the work that I need to do to verify that there is no damage by the water in all the gauges and control surfaces. I head over to the O’club write down my debrief to give to the boss. Two pints into it I see Burning Valley walking out of the head. I look over tell the barkeep to give my friend whatever he wanted to drink. I pay for the drinks, walk over to him and inform him that I had challenged him. He turns to me wanting to fly now so he can challenge up the ladder.

On our way out the door Chappie arrives saying how I am in for it now. "Phew man You stink! What is that smell coming from you, did vomited fish cologne?" Burning Valley turns to me wondering what his problem is, so I sow him the debrief I turned into Goshawk. "Well I guess I am going to have to teach you a lesson the Grease! Get in you P-38H and meet me in the sky!"

Walking over to my plane dreading it the whole way, remembering how I hate to fly those big, slow non turning, heavy noisy, no visibility having planes. I hear a salty voice call out from my hangar, where I just parked my P-51 and my crewchief working on it, getting all the water out. "Hey monkey brains, ere in hell ya tink you goin boy? I got a bone to shuv up your arse!" My heart jumps up, my sphincter tightens with the thought of anything going in where it says EXIT ONLY! "Look SM I got a match to fly now but I am more than willing to entertain you when I get back!" Starting my preflight on my huge beast, shaking my head the entire time. I give up on it as there is way to much and I see my opponent take off. I climb in, do a guns check, boy this thing is armed to the teeth!

Round 1 P38H

We start up and fair, BM doesn’t seem to be a head on shoot your engines type. So I bank around, one thing to say about this fine piece of steel is it gains a ton of speed in a dive, oh by the way, they don’t turn in a dive either. I find his six fairly quickly and hone it down to a good bead. He starts slowing down, I extend my flaps some and slow down to match, he starts weaving back and forth trying to get me to overshoot. It ain’t working, I give him some of my warm special grease. He banks around the other way and I want to keep a lead shot on him. But I yank her up and over way to fast and hard, she actually starts to spin, I recover it from spinning but remember how it gains speed in a dive, well, exactly and I cant get my wing over fast enough to keep it out of the water.

Greasemonkey 0 (sigh)
Burning Valley 1

Round 2 P51D

Thinking that BM wants to fly that 38 is because it doesn’t spin as easy, well I pick the 51 since it worked so well earlier today (the polished stainless steel panels make it faster with less lag). After merge he starts to stall coming up to my alt behind me, but saves her, and I move in for my rightful place behind him. I chase him from here to eternity, left right and such, what is this crap I just spun, the water left in the fuselage moved over to the left wing, I counter it but we are at a neutral position in a turning fight again, round and round we go, the beer is starting to make me feel queasy, remembering Chappies window cleaning incident. Also I don’t want to spin it out again, keeping a eye on the speed, flaps and a good feel of the stick for the stall warnings. I keep it on the verge of spinning I notice he is doing the same. Who will out turn who? Ready to dive under him and get a better position but just as I get ready to, he catches a wing in the water, and the other one seems kinda jealous, so it follows.

Greasemonkey 1 (Yoo Hoo)
Burning Valley 1

Round 3 Spit IXC
Well fearing he would run back to the 38H, he starts to but changes his mind for the spit 9. Again we merge, I take my time to see how he wants to fly this plane and I drop in after him, watching me he dives to help his evasion. Another turning bout ensues but I am able to tweak my plane a little better. Slowly gaining position, he makes a mistake, he breaks off either way I was moving in for the kill. He starts the weaving, but only gets halfway done. When he banks back left I give him a good taste of my .303’s well, his engine didn’t like it to well and the fire is defiantly starting to go out.

Greasemonkey 2
Burning Valley 1

Round 4 P-38H

If it worked once then it might work again. Same as before, except I keep some distance and work away at his rudders. Then he stops and straightens out for a spell, gaining some speed, I let it rip, tearing off his tail section and killing the pilot. The only good thing about this plane is it holds a lot of ammo.

Greasemonkey 3
Burning Valley 1

I call the Tug and salvage ships to come get the now Soggy Valley and all the plane parts.

Who is next, maybe I can get another match in tonight!

Burning (Soggy) Valley is a very skilled pilot, has great control of is aircraft. If you think that he is going to spin out and hit the drink, think again. So you better be on your toes. Great match bud, see ya around!

Taipan's pilotlog entry:

London Sep. 1940.

It was bloody raining again, but it didn’t matter. I had a 48-hour pass, my first in two months. All I wanted was to pop in and see how Dick was doing at Wellhouse Hospital and have a couple of pints at the Rose and Crown with the lads. I just wanted to get away from the war for a bit.
If only I had known.
I arrived at the hospital and searched out Dick. The poor sod had got bounced last week by a couple of 109’s when he was doing an instrument check. His Spit took a ruff and tumble and he couldn’t get out. He had received burns to 80 percent of his body. But Dick being a tough old bastard just carried on.
Most of the lads could not face looking at the remains of his face so they stayed away. He knew why and he didn’t mind.
As I entered the hospital I caught an attractive young nurse and got directions to Dick’s whereabouts. As I walked through the sterile white ward I glanced at some of the poor luckless sods. One chap had his entire head bandaged, yet another had no legs, still another had no arms. I cursed myself for having come here.
Suddenly a chipper voice broke through my selfish thoughts. “Johnny you old bugger, how’s the yanks treating you.?”
It was Dick. Christ he looked rough. “Very well Dick”. I retorted, putting on a smile And how’s the nurses treating you?.” Shit that was a Daft question I thought.
Dick responded with his politically correct manner. “ Rather well old bean, rather well”.
“I’ve brought you a couple of goodies from the lads. A couple of packs of fags and a bottle.”
Dick appeared to smile as I slipped the stash under his pillow.
After a couple of hours of chin wagging I decided to pull the plug and make a run for the pub.
“Well Dick, I’d better leg it old man”.
“Thanks for stopping by Johnny. It means a lot to see you.” He smiled.
“My pleasure Dick. Anything you need, let me know. These yanks are very obliging and can lay their hands on anything.” I grabbed Dick’s hand and gave him my best smile. “You take care of yourself Dick”.
As I turned to walk away, Dick spoke up in a hesitant voice. “I say Johnny, I hate to be a bother, but….”
“No bother Dick, what is it?”
“Could you drop this letter to my wife and kids. Only they haven’t been able to get up to see me and…..”
“Say no more Dick, consider it delivered”. I smiled again, turned and walked away. My Christ I thought, your own wife deserting you, what a bitch, you poor bastard.
As I left the hospital I decided to have a couple of beers with the lads before I dropped of the letter. It was six o’clock and the night was setting in.
After a couple of pints of stout, a pint of winkles, a game of darts and a few dozen jokes I figured it was time to deliver the letter to that rat bag Dick called a wife.
I stepped lively and by nine thirty I was just entering Curzon Street. Or at least what was left of it. The whole bloody street was gone. All that was left was rubble. My guts twisted I checked the envelope to make sure I had the right address.. Just then the air raid warden stepped round the corner and trod firmly on my spit shone boots.
“I beg your pardon sir. I didn’t see you there.” He looked like he didn’t mean it.
“Not to worry. “ I was still in shock. I stuttered.. “Excuse me. Do you know the Winterborn’s. I mean what happened to them”.
“Are you a relative sir?.” The warden looked at me like I was a spy. The moon glinting off of his white helmet and not so spit shone boots”.
“No, I’m a friend of Dick Winterborn. He asked me to drop a letter off to his wife and son”. My stomach was sinking as the warden’s face changed to a solemn sad look.
“I’m afraid sir”. He paused. “The Winterborn’s were killed in the air raid last week!”.
I can’t remember how long it took me to get my noggin screwed on right or how long it took me to get back to the hospital.
All I recall is the horrific moan that Dick let out when I broke the news of his family’s death to him and the turmoil that followed as the nurses and doctors subdued him and then sedated him.
I left the hospital feeling like a right bastard. My god, the thoughts that I had and how judgmental. What an arrogant shit I was.
Then….. This morning the telephone call from the hospital. Dick was dead. He had shot himself in the head out in the garden by the pond. No note. Why should he. He had no one to leave it to.
Some filthy Jerry bastard would pay, pay with his life by god.

Taipan 3 Beaker 1

Round 1
Spit 1a.
After a short engagement of vertical loops and turns we enter into a turning fight, alas the snake is not yet awake. The self was no longer alive. Here endeth the lesson.
Beaker 1 Taipan 0

Round 2
Spit 9

The Serpent awakes. We merge, I fire, I miss, I turn. We begin a dance of death, looping, turning nose down. Defense is not an option. The heart of a cold killer has been summoned. Beaker attempts to extend. I have no mercy.
Beakers plane is shredded as I pull the trigger and his tail is shattered.

Beaker 1 Taipan 1

Round 3
ME109-G

The scream of vengeance enters my ears. The savage beast is there before me. No Mercy!. We merge and Beaker extends for speed. Again we enter the dance of death. Twisting, turning. Then… Beaker stalls.
“NO PRISONERS”… “ LET LOSE THE DOGS OF WAR”. I pull the trigger as Beaker falls gracefully down in a backward spin and I drive the sword of justice into his heart.

Beaker 1 Taipan 2

Round 4
P51-D

“Once more into the breach dear friends”. Beaker comes to the serpent like a lamb to the slaughter. I pull my trigger. Sssssssssssssssssmoke, I tasssssssssste blood. The prey fights valiantly, clinging to the thin thread of life. Twisting turning… But the serpent can taste the blood and the end is swift.

Beaker 1 Taipan 3

My compliments to Beaker.
Well flown!.
Until we meet again.

Locutis' pilotlog entry:

First Round as the challenger I pick the trusty Spit , after the merge I find myself in a position to shoot so I do , but my gunnery is aweful so he gets away from me. A virticle battle ensues and it appears I have the energy advantage and soon enough I have an opportunity to make ammends for the earlier bad gunnery skills 1-0 12%

Second round Greasemonkey picks the Hog p-51D , and we are equal after the merge , equal after several attempt to get an edge in virtcle maneuvers so he hits the deck and a seriously stressful stall fight begins. All i heard for 7 minutes was that uncomfortable prestall noise untill it id did actually stall , I manage to pull out with almost nothing to spare , a quick check of my 6 revealed that my apponent was in no condition to capitalize so I gained speed , extended and tried the hammerhead on him. To no avail he seemed to be a better hog pilot than I was he countered that move with ease. Back to the stall fight but this time it appeared I had some kind of energy advantage and I came up on his 6 fast , heavey on the lead and it was 2-0 12.5 %

Third round makes me think my apponent has been reading blurs post as he picks a BF109e. I chase him to high alt and he performs a long slow turn at stall speeds. I follow him down and get to his 6 within 200ft and let go with all i had , poof , fire smoke and wings everywhere , thank goodness there is no debries model in eaw... 3-0 16%

Now if ya will excuse me I would like to go change my flight suit.....and maybe my chair too...

Greasemonkey's pilotlog entry:

The snow descended upon the base and the cold weather got worse. With all of the small prey gone and hiding the wolfs are getting hungry and restless, and start coming around the base looking for food. Hating the vermin I grab my new Mossberg 835 and load it with some 3 ½ in shells. Watching a pack of wolfs on the flightline, I start hootin and a hollerin. Most of them run of except for a stubborn gray one. I carefully take aim on him and start blasting away, keeping my shots clear of the planes and winging the stubborn animal.

Boom!!! Boom!!! Boom!! Loving the feel of my new gun, but I keep hearing shots going off, and all the sudden my backside is hurting. What the hell could this be? I spin around and see Gray Wolf with is wingmaster up to his shoulder, and he is shooting at me!!! Putting up my hands knowing I am Winchester he starts screaming at me for shooting his dog. "You inconsiderate bastard! How dare you shoot one of my wolfs? You are lucky this is just rock salt, I couldn’t find my buckshot in time! Ya think your so cute huh! Well lets settle this in the sky, then I will let you go feed my pups!"

Great, just meet the guy and he is already peppering my backside. I agree and he tells me that we will fly his spits first. While trying to get in the mindset of flying I walk over to the medic tent to get make sure my posterior is going to be fine and get some anistesia for it, so it wont bother me for my match. After the doc stopped laughing and shot me up with some Novocain, plus gave me the standard motrin cure all for a military doctor.

Having multiple connection problems we end up shooting each other up while chasing, I can see him in front of me shooting, while I take damage, he sees me shooting as his engine explodes, this happens a couple of times so we decide to both reboot and reconnect. Very sportsman guy, not wanting to take advantage of a bad connection, I thank you!

Round 1 Spit IXC

Those dam borg implants that the doc had to remove last night are starting to give me minor skin irritations and I rub on a anistsic ointment as I do my preflight. We get airborn and my arse is nice and numb, I go high he goes low, then up and over, a looping battle ensues till I spin my craft trying to get a fix on him, he takes advantage and I mange to pull out of the spin just in time for him to damage my tail section, only one thing left to do, is try to lour him in. In a nice 10 deg neg dive I gain a lot of speed and watch him stay on my six, getting more speed to catch me, I eventually hit the water but he is going well over 430 mph, and impacts on op of me! During all of this he had a 20% hit rate! To bad.

Greasemonkey 0
Gray Wolf 0
Draw 1

Round 2 Spit IXC

As the last match was a draw, we deemed it necessary to fly the same plane again, the anistetic is wearing off and my arse is starting to throb now, the hi g pulls don’t help either. Again I go low he goes hi we dance for a while trying to get the loops to line up and he gets in on my six again, we start weaving and turning tighter and tighter, he starts to get in trouble and I extend out for some speed and distance, but he catches it before it happens, then aerates my engine! Not dead in the water yet, I can now go slower than him buy a lot, he extends away and I start trying to chase him down with my smoking plane, he sees the pursuit and starts in a boom and zoom. I get a few shots in on him, he comes back around from my behind, as I am going to slow to turn, and gives me some more warm lead! But with his approach he fly’s strait into my piper and I warm up his backside some, but not enough as that slowed me down to 90 mph and full flaps, I splash down and he fly’s on.

Greasemonkey 0
Gray Wolf 1
Draws 1

Round 3 P-51D

The salt water stings on my backside tells me that all of the Novocain is worn off. We both go low and loop up and over, him un-used to this plane, on his second loop he stalls out and I move in to position, but hit the spin cycle doing so, and recover after 2 revolutions! Not fast enough as he found my 6 again, I shake him of me since I have enough smash to get over the top and he doesn’t when he brings her back around into me, he is spinning out of control, and still shoots me head on in the wing, we loop back around and he comes back at me spinning pretty hard still. He stops that quick does a wing over and he finds my 6 yet again! Not able to out turn him going slow, I figure I have enough airspeed, and since I can see the whites of his eyes behind me, when I cut the throttle and pull it over for another weave, he overshoots and my left wing slaps the water a little to hard on the front, and I do a endo! I am getting scared by this time as I am now one match away from loosing!

Greasemonkey 0
Gray Wolf 2
Draws 1

Round 4 Tempest V

My wet flight suit is holding the saltwater to close to the open, bleeding throbbing wounds in my derrière and I have a hard time staying seated in the planes without squirming. I have to keep jinking and swapping, gotta find something that works against this guy! In the tempest we start off with the vertical loops again, and I find his 6 fast, there is nothing he can do but die and die fast, I reached out and touched him with my cannons every time I squeezed my trigger, poof, he is dead!

Greasemonkey 1
Gray Wolf 2
Draws 1

Round 5 Spit IXC

He runs back to the trusty spit that he knows so well, we take to the sky’s again. Same merge, and he manages to get somewhat in favor behind me, we are in a elliptical looping battle, he manages to take a pop shot and damages my right aileron, we start whittling the speed down, This goes on for 15 minutes! Nobody stalls, or spin’s, lowering my flaps down to full I start to get in favor behind him. Gotta keep with it Grease, just stay calm and he will come into your site, just stay calm! He does, and I let her rip for all she’s worth, I pop his engine, and tear up a wing! I pull off and get some speed up so as not to do something like crash! He isn’t going down! So I give him something to eat, and zoom over in front of him, he bites! And there he goes, time for a bath!

Greasemonkey 2
Gray Wolf 2
Draws 1

Round 5 Spit IXC

Sticking with what he knows, he picks the spit for the sudden death round! At 10000 ft, we start our spiral game again, only this time I want to see if he can go to the left! I dip under loosing alt and trying to get a little closer to him. He has ESP and starts doing the same, by the time we give it up and start the slow methodical turns again, only by the time we hit 130 mph I lose him on the padlock, thinking he came up behind me fast, but I turn and see a big splash mark! Yea haw!!!

Greasemonkey 3
Gray Wolf 2
Draws 1

Thanks for the flight and the patience with the crappie connections. We got it all worked out and the match done. Your stick prowess is to be commended, and extra sensory perception is something I need because ya always knew what I was going to do! Now keep them dogs off the flightline! I need to get some rest, and put some more cream on my butt.

Wolf's pilotlog entry:

...we were trying to intercept a tip and run raid by Me 110's when we got jumped by whole Staffel of 109's,first to go was Archie McKennon,slumped over the controls his blood streaming down the canopy like rain on an automobile windscreen,the victim of an extremely well placed burst of cannon fire.Less than a minute later Angus McDonald's kite exploded,caught in the murderous cross fire from the 110's rear gunners...after that I was to busy to watch anything but my own tail...caught a 109 with a quarter deflection shot that stopped his engine...got passed by 110 in a vertical dive,one wing and most of the fusalage covered in flame...it went on like this for at least 30 minutes...chased a 109 under the cloud deck and finally caught him as he was trying to run for the Channel,put a long burst in him from almost dead astern,the plane broke up right in front of me and I had to climb to avoid the wreckage,unblievably,the pilot emerged from the twisted wreck and took to his chute,somewhat to my suprise I felt relieved,as much as I hated the Jerrys,being slowly burned to death was not a fate I would wish on anyone...

...back at the base I sat in the cockpit,soaked in sweat,my hands shaking so badly that I could not light the cigarett I'd been craving for the last hour or so...

On the advice of the head Medical Officer,the CO posted me to Scotland for a month of rest,or so he thought...let just say he was in error...

After reporting in I was assigned to aircraft testing,both ours and captured German machines.Captain NINJA was north for a while doing some testing of some hush hush equipment so he volenteered to fly with me...said this time we would keep score...

SORTIE 1-SPITFIRE Mk1a,After the merge we got into a good old fashioned knife fight,went from 10,000 feet down to 10 feet in a close turning fight that got right down to the water,unfortunatly he dipped a wingtip and got to go for a swim.I radioed his position and waited for SAR to get there.
WOLF-1
NINJA-0
SORTIE 2-P-47C,borrowed a couple of Thunderbolts from the 4th and went out over the North Sea,we both found out the while the 47 is a very rugged machine it's not the most nimble plane in the world,while in a scissoring maneuver Ninja got to close to the water and caught his prop,got SAR out again.
WOLF-2
NINJA-0
SORTIE 3-Me110C,While flying a captured example of this aircraft I was engaged head on by another 110,afterwards NINJA swore it wasn't him but a real one I tied up with,he hit one of my engines on the merge but let the plane get away from him as he tried to turn on my six,while he was spinning I did him the favor of giving him 50 or 60 rounds of cannon ammo,ill mannered brute didn't even thank me either,I got smoke from his left engine just before he recovered from the spin,he broke low to extend but he was close enough to me that I was able to turn in behind him and shoot his tailplane off.
WOLF-3
NINJA-0

Thanks for the fight buddy,it was an HONOR to fly you Sir.This one makes 5 so I'll thank you again.
SALUTE!!!
Jim

Ninja's pilotlog entry:

PARENTIAL DISCRESSION ADVISED

I was laying down my bed thinking about the day I would become king. But I think coyote heard my whispers so he kicked it out my bed saying let's dance.

Round One: FW190 VS FW190

I don't know what he meant, but it sounds kinky. We danced all night starting with the FW190D as we merge
on the dance floor and looking at each other gracefully and winking. He turns and I turned like a ballerina spanking each other ass's as we passed. Unfortunately his ass was redder then mine and decide to call for another round of it.

Ninja 1, Coyote 0

Round Two: FW190 VS FW190
Once again I danced gracefully like an angel and took my sweet little gun behind him and spanking him very lightly, but as the result it was too much for him to take.

Ninja 2, Coyote 0

Round Three: FW190 VS FW190
As a result of the first incident we decide to do that dance again. Boy! Coyote dance very well. In my surprised
he had a bigger gun than I do.

Ninja 2, Coyote 1

Round Four to Six: P-38H VS P-38H
Now it was time for a different dance. This times a more devilish type of rocking rolling. We turned, twisted,
smacked, spanked, man it felt good! We also loved the way we kneed each other painfully.

Ninja 2, Coyote 1, Draw 3

Round Seven: P-38H VS P-38H
The waltzing continued on. But this time I stomped on his feet so hard that he dazzle about. I took the
opportunity to do a fancy dip to finish the dance.

Ninja 3, Coyote 1, Draw 3

SALUTE COYOTE!
ITS BEEN A PLEASURE FLYING WITH YOU.

Greasemonkey's pilotlog entry:

Slowly walking by the rankings board, on the same route I take every time I go to the latrine. I notice there is now a pilot above me who is open and able to fly. Windigo!! Now to find him and tell him, but where could I find this pilot, in the simulator, or the classroom reading up and practicing so the S/M will get off his back? Nope, I search high and low, with no luck, but then I hear that weathered, southernish voice, with a drawlike tone that couldn’t be mistaken for anything else. The hollering is coming from the outhouse, knowing that Windigo had been giving the duty of keeping it clean, I had to go and make sure he knew of his impending doom, but do I want to go and get in the way of the SM? I wait out by the DFP (defensive fighting position) for the old man to leave.

The SM goes storming off, something about all these dam ceremonies he had to attend, "Dey giv one 'em chuncks of dung to anyone, might I shuld put an ole coon hound in fer one…" Boy something is getting to him, but as he walks away, he becomes even harder to understand. I slip in front of the outhouse, peer in, but the cloud of gas emanating from there, is more than I can handle. I stagger back and holler out loud for Windigo. He comes out sopping wet, and smelling just like the box he had been locked in all week.

"Whatcha need Grease?" I ask him if he has anymore planes left so we might be able to get a match going. "Naw, but I tell you what bud, OK here's the deal, after my last match I coated the Sgt.!$#@! Major's latrine seat with high strength epoxy sealant so he will be occupied for awhile. Then, while he is busy if I can I will "borrow" a plane from Goshawk when he is in the O club and if he doesn't have any, then I will tell Koko that Maddog has a crush on her but is to shy too say anything.

Then when he is under the attack if you will I will "inspect" one of his spit's :^) Whatcha think? Will it work?"

"Sounds like a plan, if that is how you want to go about doing it! Just better hope he never finds out it was you!"

Later on in the week Ninja throws one hell of a party at the O’club, but only he puts it on Coyote’s bill! I am having a great time, getting pretty sloshed when Windigo runs into the club, sneaking around the edges so as not to be seen. I look over and he starts waving me over, whispering that it is all set and we need to go fly now! Just the thought of it going through my mind had me laughing all the way to my plane, the maneuverable spit
IA. As much as I try I just cant keep from laughing while doing my preflight, but then one the spit and sputter of the engine breathing fire, it snaps into my mind what I am getting ready to do.

Round 1 Spit IA
Pretty neutral start, kinda like playing yo, yo’s but eventually I get in favor, starting to hone my chase down to a good bead, and sufficient lead. I give him some of my warm special grease to remind him of where I am at, but my aim isn’t that good, he gets really scared, and starts turning and jinking, varying speed and doing everything in the book to get me of his tail, but eventually he forgets how high he is and cant turn tight enough in hislast split-s to clear the water.

Greasemonkey 1, Windigo 0

Round 2 P51D
"Well if you are good enough to fly the spit IA like that then lets see how you can handle the spin doctor hog of a plane" Pretty much the same as before, but he is having a harder time managing his airspeed, does a nice cobra maneuver, then ends up extending far away, so I must set up for his attack, I see him regain control and then turn into me, the we start the unequal turning fight, He starts trying to take some deflecting shots at me, but just wastes his ammo, and I eventually widdle down on his flight path and warm him up, again doing everything in the book and some things that aren’t (I think he has been reading Coyotes notebook). On his way back down in a barrel roll, and when he comes across my piper again, I aerate his engine compartment. But we are low and really slow this time, and I start a spin, recovering with less than 100 ft, on the verge of another stall as this plane likes to do when recovering from a stall, I control it, extend and climb slowly to return to base.

Greasemonkey 2, Windigo 0

Round 3 Spit IXC
"Just how well rounded a pilot are you? Lets try this one now!" Same elliptical flight path, only I start taking some cheap shots at him, nice black poufs of smoke, then I think I end putting a bullet in his shoulder, as on one pass he exposes his cockpit to me, and I get a clean shot. He stops that quick and we try to see who can out turn who, but I quickly show him how to do it right, play with throttle, flaps and keep it on the edge of spinning. I
move up behind him quickly rattle his cage and he starts into his book again. Eventually he can't avoid it any more, and jerks it to hard to force a overshoot, but decides to swim again.

Greasemonkey 3, Windigo 0

I call in to the slowest tug, to go get Windigo, so he will have plenty of time to explain his actions to the SM and Gos. I also have to make plans to get my service dress uniform altered to fit now.

Windigo's version of above encounter:

"!#$%#@&^$%&*@!$%^@$#%~!@$#%#%&@$ Sgt. Major!!!" I muttered under my breathe as I went back into the odiforous eddifice that was his loo.Well, I had decided that tonight was THE night.Goshawk was bound to be in the O club having a pint or two. Combining that with the fact that a really ellegant meal was prepared for the Sgt. Major by Chuck (the cook I handed a 5 spot to, to add extra ingredients to the S/M's dinner:^). I was just putting on the final coat of sealant and leaving the loo when i heard footstep and barely had time to duck around the corner unseen when I heard "his Royal pain in my Arse" enter his loo.

I couldn't help but giggle as I walked away and headed to the O'club to double check on Goshawk and tell GM to meet me in the air. I see Gos sitting over in a corner talking and laughing with Beaker, MadDog "the first", and Tiapan. I gave a wink and a nod to Taipan to let him know things were set. Tiapan then bought Gos a drink (on a 5 spot I had supplied) to keep Gos's attention.

I let Greasemonkey know that I was ready and I slipped out the door. On my way to the planes I heard bellowing and whimpers coming from the now infamous loo. God life is good!

I climbed into one of Gos's Spit IA's to borrow it and give it a once over for flight capabilities, heck he can thank me later for
checking it out for him,GGG>.

As I took to the sky, I checked my equipment. OK, lucky sock I found at the bottom of Thog's locker,, check. Ginsu cutlery ,,,, check,,,,, Coyote's flight secrets the abridged version (liberated for a short time from his foot locker),, check,,,,,, and my own special secret weapon,, my totally nude signed photo of Greta Garbo to distract the Greasemonkey,,,, Oh No, I forgot my secret weapon!!!! Damn it all to hell!!! Oh well, I'll have to improvise!

Flight one: We approach and I can't get him to look me in the eye on the head-on. We turn and turn and turn. Did I mention this was a turning battle? Finally I forgot to check my altitude when doing ACM 192843 on page 936 of Coyote's manual.

Flight 2: I manage to get back to base and acquire a P-51 from Gos. "Hey", I tell myself, "the guy has so many he'll never notice if one or two are missing." We took to the air and I tried the old boom and zoom.Well I zoomed but GM said "nuhuh" on the boom part. Contrary to GM's post it wasn't just by accident that he almost bought it in a spin. You see, I took my "Greta Garbo" pic and stuck it up on the plexiglass behind my head. Once GM seen it, his jaw hit the stick and thus caused his plane to go into a spin. He managed to recover but he glanced at it again as I went into the drink and almost went with me.

Flight 3: This time it's almost dawn and I have to hurry. So I acquire one of Maddog "the first's" Spit IXC's ( by the way bud you take real good care of that one I noticed,, all shiny and clean. This time I take out all the stops. On the first pass I hang Thog's sock out the window and the fumes seem to make GM a little woosie. He seems to be having problems. But not long enough as he begins to slice me up so I use my alternate plan, my secret weapon. I lifted my flight shirt and started flashing GM. He started laughing which bought me a few minutes. Then, he came back again so I started throwing ginsu knives at
him,, lost them all then i went into the drink.

I made my way back to base as the sun was rising and I scurried off to my bunk. Actually, under it for fear of being found by MD, Gos, or Sgt. Major. I ain't coming up, nope, nope, nope, so forget it!! Go fly someone else,,, nope, nope, nope.

"WINDIGO!!"

"THREE WORDS, SLAGHEAP!"

"YOU'RE ON CHARGE!"

-SgtMjr. McCulloughy

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